Alice's Adventures in Humperland - 1

'That is not said right,' said the Caterpillar.
'Not QUITE right, I'm afraid,' said Alice, timidly, 'some of the words have got altered.'
'It is wrong from beginning to end,' said the Caterpillar decidedly.

(If this inspires you, please drop me a line: I'd love to see other people do other chapters of the story in any form - written story, photos, comics, movies, whatever!).

Chapter 1: Down the Tepid Hole

Alice had definitely got bored of sitting by her sister on the bank and had walked away all alone. Her sister had been reading one of these magazines again, full of photos of so-called celebrities - Alice didn't know the majority of them - and telling silly details about their lives, as if all this had any importance at all… No, Alice really didn't like these, and preferred her own, those showing photos of naked people inserting various parts of their anatomies into holes in the bodies of other people, something that for some reason made her feel very excited, and had a surprising effect on the part of herself lying between her thighs. Sadly, she hadn't brought any with her, but she didn't really need these to occupy herself with much more interesting activities.

She tried to focus on one of the images she remembered from one of her magazines. It was one showing a woman having something that was usually only displayed on men, and inserting it in the rear hole of a beautiful lady, while a handsome gentleman was inserting his in the lady's front hole. That picture made her feel good because the first woman reminded her of herself, even if the woman's male part was much bigger than hers, and that it seemed to always be there and not to disappear inside when she wasn't aroused as hers did. The mental image was only starting to produce its effect when she suddenly saw in the corner of her eye something rather uncommon.

A rabbit. Nothing uncommon about a rabbit, you might say, but this one was a bit peculiar… She knew there were male and female rabbits, of course, and that their bits were more or less looking like those of human beings. But somehow, she felt that the bits of rabbits should be much smaller than the ones she could see in her magazines. But this rabbit had a huge male part, looking very hard, and defying the laws of gravity in front of him… But what definitely startled her and made her lose her focus was when she heard the rabbit talk. "Oh my effing gawd, I'm so goddamn horny, have to find her quick!".

She watched the rabbit running away with eyes open wide until it disappeared in the forest nearby. She thought for a moment, looking at her dildo, then at the forest, then at her dildo again… No, she was just too curious, she started to her feet and ran after the creature.

She quickly could see it in front of her, right before it arrived at a clearing with a big tree in the middle of it. And to her surprise again, it jumped, and disappeared into what seemed to be a hole in the tree.

Now that was something else! She got closer to the tree and turned around it, looking for where the rabbit had dived in. There! But what a strange hole it was for a tree! It looked soft, a bit wet, like a slit made of something looking like flesh.

Alice looked carefully, then slowly put her hand on the hole. The feeling was weird. It was tepid, moist, nothing like a tree. And Alice was just sure she could feel it react to her touch. She tentatively pushed her hand in the hole, the warm wetness sucking on her arm, now distinctively feeling it stretch open. She tried to pull back, but couldn't: she was stuck in the hole. She tried to help herself with her other hand, but the opening was so slippery, soon her second arm was stuck in it too. And even more! There seemed to be some kind of pulse in there that pulled her in! 'No, no, no, no!', Alice muttered, trying to get out of it. But there was just no way, soon her head reached the hole, and started to be sucked in too. She took a deep breath, and just let herself go - there was nothing else to do -, sliding inside faster and faster.

Alice didn't know what to expect. The rabbit had actually jumped into that hole, so it was probably not dangerous, but so far, she couldn't breathe and she was a bit nervous. The inside was strangely cozy though, the warmth comfortable, and the wetness felt somehow… arousing. But she couldn't enjoy it for long, because soon, she felt her hands pop out on the other side, and was quickly able to pull herself forward with her arms, freeing her head, allowing her to start breathing again.

A gush of panic ran through her as she opened her eyes and saw the hole just opened on another bigger hole, going down, and apparently so deep that she couldn't see the bottom of it. She tried to get hold of something, but there just was nothing to get hold of. As soon as her waist got out of the hole, she slipped out completely and fell down.

She opened her mouth to cry out in fear, but suddenly stopped. She looked around her, getting a glimpse of the walls of the hole, and noticed they weren't going as fast as they ought to. Yes, she was falling, but it was the slowest fall she had ever experienced. 'Nothing dangerous in that', she thought, 'no way I can hurt myself at this speed.' She took a deep breath to calm herself down, and looked around.

The walls of the hole looked weird - that didn't even surprise her, she was starting to get used to weirdness. It looked like some kind of flesh again, soft and wet but also quite dark, with some kind of pulse in them. She tried to move a bit as she fell and found out she could get closer to the wall. As the details became clearer, she spotted quite a few shelves on it, with what seemed to be pots or jars on the shelves.

She managed to get close enough to have a better look - as slow as she was falling, this was actually pretty easy. Pots they were, and she grabbed one, looking at the tag on it. It said: 'Milk Jam ;-)'. 'Oh now, that's nice!', thought Alice. She hadn't eaten for quite some time, and was starting to feel a bit hungry. She opened the pot, dipped her fingers in it, raised them to her mouth, and licked them eagerly.

This wasn't milk jam at all. She grimaced as she felt the taste. She had expected something sweet, but this definitely wasn't sweet, somehow salted, but not so much. Strange taste, and strange jam too, a bit warm, a bit sticky, and way too white for milk jam. She took another taste, and found out she kind of liked it after all. She licked her fingers clean, her tongue running along them hungrily, sucking them deep in her mouth.

She got as much of the tasty substance as she could from the pot and swallowed it all. Soon, she wasn't feeling hungry anymore, and wondered what she would do with the almost empty pot. She considered throwing it down for a second, but thought there might be someone down there, and decided it was safer to put it back on a shelf.

And suddenly, she was at the bottom. Her fall has indeed been slow, and her landing was completely harmless. The floor seemed to be the same as the walls of the hole, soft, warm, a bit wet, and as she put her hand on it, she could feel some kind of moves inside, as it it was the entrails of some big organism.

She shrugged and raised her head. There was a corridor right in front of her, with doors on either side, and she realised that she hasn't been far behind the rabbit: there it was, right in front of her, but running fast.

She saw it disappear and hurried after it.

She passed quite a few doors on the way, not taking the time to stop and try to open any of them, but soon arrived at the end of the corridor. It was a small round room, with doors all around, and a single three-legged table at the centre.

There was nothing on the table except a tiny golden key. Alice thought it might open one of the doors in the room, but after trying them out, it would not open any of them. The key just seemed too tiny, or the locks too large. But as she lowered her gaze, she noticed a door that she hadn't yet seen. It was a very tiny one, and it looked like the key might work with it. She knelt, and tried.

And it worked! The door opened to another corridor, very small, and as she bent over to get a glimpse of what lied ahead, she saw something looking like a lovely garden at the other end. But there was just no way she could slip through that door.

This was no use waiting by this little door, so she stood up and got back to the table, half-hoping she had missed something, like another key that would open a larger door. And indeed, there was something else on the table, but it was not a key…

Now this looked very much like the bit attached to men in her magazines! Except it wasn't attached to anyone at all. And there was a tag on it, that read 'Suck me!'. She pondered. She had already seen women taking these in their mouthes - on photos of course, not for real - and it didn't seem very complicated. 'OK, let's try', she thought, 'How can this be dangerous in any way after all?'. She took the thing in her hands, knelt down, as she had seen the women do, held it right in front of her mouth, wrapped her lips around it, and pushed herself forward, getting it as deep as she dared.

She felt the thing react as she swallowed it, somehow throbbing a little, and getting a bit more erect. She made her lips move along it steadily, sucking it in, then pulling herself back until only the tip remained in her mouth. Quite soon, it got very tense, and it was throbbing really hard. She sucked on, surprised to see how she enjoyed that. She felt her own little male part start to swell, peeking out more and more under her dress.

But suddenly, the thing shook in her hands, as if in a spasm, and a gush of fluid flowed in her mouth. She didn't expect that, but managed not to gasp, swallowing all of the warm and thick substance. It strangely tasted exactly as the so-called 'milk jam' there was in the pot in the hole. She sucked on, waiting for all of it to ooze out, drinking every drop of it.

And as soon as it was done, she felt a bit dizzy… She closed her eyes, shook her head. And when the feeling was over, she looked around. Darn, did everything suddenly get bigger or what? The doors were still there, but they were huge. And the table… It looked incredibly high!

'Oh!', she thought, 'But I must be exactly the right size for this little door, now!'. She rushed to it, and to her delight, it was indeed the case! She grabbed the handle… Locked… How silly she was! She had locked the door again before returning to the table. The table! She rushed back to it, looking around to find the key. Then the thought hit her mind. She raised her eyes, and let out a deep sigh… The key was there, right on top of the table. But it was so high! She stood on her tippy toes, extended her arm as high as she could, but there was just no way she could reach it…

She sat down, cursing herself in her mind with the rudest words she knew - and she knew quite a few… But after a time, she decided it was no use staying this way. 'Come on', she said to herself, 'there just must be a way to get out of here!'. She looked around…

And again, she spotted something that she was sure wasn't there before. It looked like a ball, but with a weird slit-shaped opening on top of it. She got closer, and saw this looked like the front hole she could see on the women in her mags - and like the one she had under her little male part too. And again, there was a tag on it. It read: 'Lick me!'

Alice thought a bit about it. 'The thing I sucked had quite a strange effect, what should I do now? Mmmm… Well, anyway, if I stay this way, I'm stuck here, so what can possibly be worse than that?'. She popped her tongue out, just giving the slit a little lick. Again, it reacted to it, the lips around the slit seeming to swell under her tongue. She gathered her courage, grabbed the ball with both hands and dived into it, starting to lick it hungrily, burying her mouth in it.

Soon, the ball started to shiver, the opening getting wider and wider, until it seemed to jerk in her hands, some fluid oozing out of the slit. She ran her tongue all over, licking it, swallowing it all. 'Now that's a very different taste than the previous one!', she thought, trying to figure out what it reminded her. But suddenly, she felt dizzy again and had to close her eyes. A weird feeling ran through her body. 'How weird', she thought, 'I'm quite used to some part of me getting bigger, but now it feels like it's happening to my whole body…'.

As the dizziness went away, she opened her eyes…